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June 30, 2004

Holiday

I am going on holiday soon :-) and about time too! But I have a slight snag. I want to go to France. I am going to get the boat to St Malo. I want to spend about a week there (6 days I think). I want to travel around by train (because if I drive I can't have that lovely bottle of wine for lunch / or get twatted in the evening). Now the snag is, I don't know where I want to go. Basically all I want to do is go to nice French towns, eat, drink and stay in a B & B. But I want to move around France for a bit and not stay in one place. Now here's where I am hoping that some of you maybe able to give me some ideas. Any of you been to France before? Anyone ever traveled round France by Train? If so please leave a comment with your ideas. Failing that, anyone know of any cheapish holidays direct from Jersey to a nice hot place for a getaway? Waiting in anticipation ::::::::::::::

Posted by Markiss at 4:35 PM | Comments (0)

Glastonbury mud

Well i've seen it all now. Ebay has gone too far this time. Glastonbury mud up for sale on eBay And to prove it you can find the auction here and it's now going for a massive £686.66. Why not bid for some other Glastonbury items while you are there. There are loads.

Posted by Markiss at 2:14 PM | Comments (0)

Interesting Evening

Well that was an interesting evening........ Sold a few more tickets, down the pub, for the party in July. Sorted Joes website dilema out and am now waiting for Jeremy to send me some more soil prizes. Oh and pissed someone off too. Well that's just life :-) At least I am managing to keep blogging. Roll on Wednesday ! Out for a meal tomorrow night, really looking forward to it. Haven't been out for grub for ages. Mmmmmm, Steak au poivre please :) (Random Blog) !!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Posted by Markiss at 12:15 AM | Comments (0)

June 29, 2004

On my mind today!

How come wrong numbers are never busy?

&

Crime doesn't pay... does that mean my job is a crime?

Posted by Markiss at 5:32 PM | Comments (0)

Bart

Bart Board link thing

Posted by Markiss at 4:10 PM | Comments (0)

Long time no Blog

Well i'm back again! I do apologise for the lack of uninteresting blogage here but I decided to treat myself to a well earned break. No work or blogging for 3 days :-) And now it's going to all get back to normal! Well try to at least. So what have I been up to this weekend? Well if you take the drink out of the equation then not much. It's been a typical Jersey weekend really. Friday was spent down the local and then when that closed a load of us went upstairs for some more drinks. Got a bit hazy that night. Things I remember from it are: Head and hand in melting wax (hot!), Paper stack head walk and Shoes far too small....... Any ideas what I am going on about? Me neither but was a laugh. Saturday had a day of computer games. Mate came up at 3pm, networked our computers and played Unreal Tournament for hours. Then down the local at 8pm, Devils Hole for 9pm ish then back to local for last orders. Then me and my big mouth started and suddenly there was a party at mine. Loads of Led Zeppelin playing! That finished about 4:30am.

Sunday was my day of rest. Well it was meant to have been anyway. I ended up doing all the housework. Not very Rock 'n' Roll but it had to be done. Then down to the local for a few in the evening. Yesterday was another rest day. A bit of sun, reading a book in the garden and generally getting my head together for work the next day.
Must admit, it is good to be back at work. For some reason I miss it if I am away for too long. Sad isn't it? Anyway that's my weekend. Hope you all had good ones too. Byeeeeeee........

Posted by Markiss at 3:07 PM | Comments (0)

June 25, 2004

Ow !!!!!!

Ow my head! What happened last night? At least I wasn't in town! That's all I can manage at the moment :-(

Posted by Markiss at 12:54 PM | Comments (0)

June 24, 2004

My big mouth

Forgot to tell you about me and my big mouth on Tuesday night. Well, cut a long story short. I was down St Mary's, which was very quiet that night, and there were a few holiday makers there. They all seemed to be enjoying themselves and at 10:30pm ish they all left to go and catch the bus into town. Well about 15 minutes later they all came back in and ordered some more drinks. They were saying how annoyed they were at missing the bus. They were out there early and the bus must have left even earlier. So me being me, piped up and said "Oh that's quite normal for buses over here, the bus drivers don't give a damn about us in the country" etc etc. To my horror, there were only 2 of them who were on holiday, the other 2 lived here and the bloke was infact a Jersey bus driver! What are the chances? Anyway the conversation was quite interesting in the end. There were no fights for me slagging them off, just a lot of laughing. The bus driver and I ended up having a good chat and he was even agreeing with me that they were slack. He ended up getting a taxi home and said if it ever happened to me then just get a taxi and charge the bus company for it. Probably easy for him to get away with it, but for us mere mortals, I would have thought it would be quite difficult to prove that I was actually waiting for one in the first place. Anyway, he did it and said there would be no problem. So let's see if I can try it out. I have some taxi driving mates so maybe they can give me a receipt and I can send it into the Bus Station and see what happens. Fat lot of chance!

Posted by Markiss at 2:18 PM | Comments (0)

June 23, 2004

Oh Dear - Zoophilia is here!

Just had a look at my stats for this site and found that some people are coming here to see my zoophilia blog! I am number 14 on msn for the search zoophilia and number 1 on google and msn for the search zoophilia phsyco. Oh and if you search for it Zoophilia on Google have a look at the 6th search listings address! Can you believe it is called markis-assho.com? Nothing to do with me Honest! And to think I blogged this! I am going to get even more hits for it now.........

Posted by Markiss at 5:11 PM | Comments (0)

Phone number

So what does your phone number spell? Any ideas? Well find out at Phone Spelling. My personal number spelt 7-DIRTY and my office number spelt PEN-197 strange being that we are architects! Don't know about my personal one though! And whilst we are on the subject, what about anagrams of your name? This one can be a bit embarrassing. For Markiss I got kiss arm and if I added co.uk for markiss.co.uk I got suck kim soar Hmmmmm? Who's Kim then? Try yours out at the Anagramsite I must have been bored to blog that lot :-)

Posted by Markiss at 4:39 PM | Comments (0)

What a computer

I want one..........Take a look at this computer. Anyone fancy buying me one? I would be really nice to you if you did :-)

Posted by Markiss at 4:03 PM | Comments (0)

June 22, 2004

We Beat Portugal

Well we won the football last night. So we are playing Portugal on Thursday now. But we have already beaten them. Well in flag designs anyway. England 70 - Portugal 40. Maybe it's an omen? Enough about football now. Nearly getting bored of it now! Well apart from this one. Football team secretly filmed practising how to fake a foul....!

Bored? Try Fly swat. Then you will definitely be bored.

Posted by Markiss at 2:03 PM | Comments (0)

June 21, 2004

Party Night

I have been trying to organise a party night recently. I have now got dates and times etc. So if anyone fancies coming to it could they put there names down on the forms left in the following pubs. St Mary's Country Inn, The Farmers Inn and The Devils Hole. It will be held at the Prince of Wales, Greve de Lecq on July 24th, 9pm - 1am. There will also be coaches to pick you up outside St Mary's Country Inn and The Farmers Inn. Then coaches to take you back too! Tickets will cost £5, that's for the coach and entrance. Should be a good laugh! We will have 3 D.J's and some strange variety of entertainment too (being kept a secret until the actual night). There will also be a "semi famous" guest appearance at the beginning of the night. All the proceeds from the party will be going to Jersey Hospice Care. There are limited places, so get your name down soon to avoid disappointment!

Posted by Markiss at 5:13 PM | Comments (0)

June 20, 2004

Slack

I have been slack with my blog recently. Have been far too busy with both work and play. Excuses excuses! Well this weekend has been much of the same really. Going to the pub in the evenings then helping Paula move into her house. Putting up computer desk/chair, sorting out dvd and t.v etc etc. Found a photo of her dog there too. Don't you think she looks like a real life Scrappy Doo? Today I haven't done much really. Gave my Dad his Father's day presents and card. He loved the wine but don't know when he will actually get round to drinking it though. He collects it instead of drinking it! Other way round for me :-) Chopped up some wood for the winter as well. Aren't I the organised one? Now I am going to do my weekly blog read of all my freinds sites, should take a while. Enjoy your Sunday............

Posted by Markiss at 5:24 PM | Comments (0)

June 17, 2004

Feet up @ 5pm

Ahhhh, finished another job. They seem to be rolling off the drawing board (computer actually but that didn't sound right!) pretty quickly at the moment. Did a survey yesterday and finished drawing up another survey today. Now since England are playing tonight and the kick off is at 5pm, will I feel guilty about finishing a bit early today so I can watch it? Probably , yes. But I think I will anyway. I'm not really into to football that much but I do like watching England when they are playing. Feet up with a beer at 5pm............ XLNT!

Posted by Markiss at 3:38 PM | Comments (0)

June 16, 2004

More Weird Links

So here I go lowering the tone, again, with the one and only Masturbation Game. What ever next? How old are you? Not in years but in days I am 12437 days old and my next Major Decimal Birthday is my 13000th day on 30 December 2005. When is yours? Do you write like a boy or girl? Try this Gender Genie. According to Koppel and Argamon, the algorithm should predict the gender of the author approximately 80% of the time. I tried it with 2 peoples blogs I read. It got it right on one of them, the guys. Make your own Michael Jackson. Why would anyone want to? But you can here. And finally for today. Shake that ass Bitch XLNT!

Posted by Markiss at 3:54 PM | Comments (0)

Shocked and Saddened

I have only just found out some very sad news. A friend of mine has just been named as the missing man in Jersey. On Monday a man was reported missing after he didn't show up at home for lunch. His clothes were found on the rocks at La Moye. Stefan has been a friend of mine since I was born basically. I don't know what else to say. I can't stop fearing the worst! Jersey Evening Post

Posted by Markiss at 1:02 PM | Comments (0)

June 15, 2004

Nursery Rhymes

Just had to share this one with you. The real truth behind Nursery Rhymes WARNING not work safe ::::: Has sound with swear words!

Posted by Markiss at 3:49 PM | Comments (0)

Psycho

Since reading about Kelly's problem she had with a certain Psycho, it reminded me of the site called psycho ex girlfriend. Unfortunately his site isn't up on the Internet anymore but that link will take you to the archived site of it. Can you imagine getting calls like that? I wonder what goes through the minds of Phsyco's? Hasn't she got the hint that the guy isn't interested? Oh well at least he got loads of stuff to put on his website from her :-)

On a different note, what an xlnt invention it's on my shopping list now. Bet you all go home and try out this tonight to see if it really works. And since Heavy Metal has been on the agender this week. Remember when they used to put messages in the records and if you played it backwards you could hear them? Well now you can do it for yourselves.

Posted by Markiss at 3:18 PM | Comments (0)

June 14, 2004

Rock ruled

Was watching a program on T.V last night called "When Rock Ruled the World". It brought back loads of good memories for me. I am so lucky that I was growing up with such good bands. Led Zeppelin, Black Sabbath, Rainbow, Pink Floyd, AC/DC, KISS, Whitesnake, Van Halen, Iron Maiden, Quiet Riot, DIO, Uriah Heep etc etc etc soooo many more. That's when bands used to be bands. I sometimes feel sorry for those people who missed out on all of that and had to put up with the "Boy Band" era / early 90's onwards. Even though they would all say that music nowdays is good. They just never experienced the Rock age. O.K there are a few good bands to choose from now days but I can only count them on one hand. Bring back the real bands I say. God, could you imagine Led Zeppelin miming on stage? Nah don't think so.

Posted by Markiss at 2:49 PM | Comments (0)

Start of a New week.

Well that was another full weekend. I think I am getting too old for all this partying these days :-) But it was well worth it. Wasn't partying all weekend though. On Saturday I recharged the battery for my boat and tried to empty bits and pieces out of it. Hopefully it will be ready in a few weeks, so the fishing can start soon. Only problem is that Jersey has had an invasion of Dolphins for the past 2-3 weeks. That's good for animal lovers (no not that sort!) the normal type of animal lovers but not that good for fishermen. You see a dolphin while you are fishing and you might aswell stop fishing because they scare all the fish away. Oh and while looking for a part for my boat I stumbled on this little beauty. Anyone fancy going halves with me? Might have to get a bigger berth though! On Sunday I went for a walk with Lisa down the Green Lanes in St Mary. Was nice to get out and about. You realise how lucky you are living here when you take a walk around. Lovely place. And now for a few links: Another eBay fruit cake link. Fancy buying a genuine Air Guitar from the Eighties? And finally singing Eugene. I haven't got a clue what that's all about.

Posted by Markiss at 1:13 PM | Comments (0)

June 13, 2004

Owww My head!

Well thanks to Paula's house warming party last night, I seem to have a major problem with my head today. Oh and the legs! Think I am still under the influence at the moment. Was a great party. Thanks Paula, can't remember leaving though. Oh and the disk you gave me was empty, no Scrappy Doo on it! Can I have another please? Now getting ready for the England vs France (Euro 2004) football game tonight. Can feel a few more beers coming on :-) Come on Engerlaaaaand. And finally..........: A big HAPPY BIRTHDAY to Anne Frank, who would have been 75 yesterday, had she survived the war.

Posted by Markiss at 5:45 PM | Comments (0)

June 11, 2004

Waterbomb Catapult

Oh and Robert, I almost forgot. It's been ordered and is on it's way. Boyz and their Toyz huh!

Posted by Markiss at 6:18 PM | Comments (0)

Losers dot Org

Have been doing a typical "search the Internet" for the last half hour and came across Losers dot Org. Think I found one of the sickest / sadest / weirdest sites on the net there. I will leave the link for the end of this post. Basically the Losers site has links to Losers sites :-) Not that hard to sus out! Anyway let's have a look at a couple. Oh my god my eyes are killing me. Now that's what I call web design! Couldn't read anything on that site. And what about a woman who has a fetish about being Handicapped! She is perfectly okay but uses wheelchairs, crutches and even hooked hands. I could understand if she was doing an experiment on accessibility into buildings etc but just as a fetish? Mind you what ever turns people on is up to themselves. I don't mind. Now the one I did kinda mind about. You've heard of bestiality right? But have you heard of a Delphinic Zoophile? No? Well this should explain it : "Zoophilia is best described as a love of animals so intimate that the person (and the animal) involved have no objections to expressing their affection for each other in the sexual fashion" So a Delphinic Zoophile is someone who likes having sex with Dolphins then! This guy has actually put up a website about his fetish called dolphinsex. Well that's enough from me today, hope you all have a good weekend.

Posted by Markiss at 5:55 PM | Comments (0)

June 10, 2004

Free Gmail Giveaway Again

"Thanks for using Gmail and helping us improve the service. We're ready to expand our test to a few more users, and because you've been a trusted early tester of Gmail, we're looking for your help. Please invite a few more people who you think would like Gmail and could help us make it even better."

Well that's what Gmail said! I have now got another 3* Gmail accounts to give away, if anyone is interested?
Since I had quite a few people wanting one last time and the fact that some other people are selling these accounts on eBay for up to $61 each, I thought I would change how I did things this time and make it a bit more interesting. So, if you would like an account? Could you leave a comment saying so but also leave a joke for me. The funniest 3** jokes will get an account. (That's the ones that I find the funniest)
No emailing this time, only accepting comments this time round.
Just thought it could be a laugh :-)

* I have 3 at the moment but did promise someone else an account. I will find out if he has got one or not. If he hasn't then I will only be giving away 2. If he has then all 3 are up for grabs. (I keep my word you see)
** Obviously same as above. Funniest 2 if the 3rd account goes.

Posted by Markiss at 4:42 PM | Comments (0)

eBay

Here are some of the more interesting eBay sites. It's amazing what you can stumble on at eBay. Take a look at this for example. This Mum decides to sell her sons beloved Playstation 2 for being naughty. Bless her :-) Selling Son's Beloved Play Station 2 For Punishment!

Then there are the comment's which you get when you have bought or sold something. Basically this gives you a good or bad reputation. Well take a look at these eBay comments.

Posted by Markiss at 4:26 PM | Comments (0)

New Music and Films

I have got my hands on a new c.d and some dvd's recently. Birthday presents you see :-) Anyway, just wanted to write down what I think of the ones I have seen and heard. Firstly is the c.d. It is Anastacia's new album, self titled "Anastacia". What a voice this woman has got. Didn't know whether I would like it at first but it has turned out that it is xlnt. Think I like it because of it's rocky nature. Most of the songs on the album are good too. Not just the single on it called "Left Outside Alone" And to think she was told, when she was younger, that she couldn't sing and would never make it. Just goes to show what they knew! Anyway I would definitely recommend it. Go and get it and see what you think. Then comes the dvd's. They are : "S.W.A.T", "Kill Bill", "Lord of the Rings" (King one), "The Extraordinary League of Gentlemen" and "Love Actually". I have seen the last two mentioned and they were both good but Love Actually was xlnt. I didn't think I would get to grips with it when I saw the trailers. Watching it soon changed my mind. It has 10 different story lines going on at the same time but it all works out really well. It is great to see that the English are still producing such good films. That reminds me, I have still got "Moulin Rouge" in it's wrapping at home, have never had the urge to watch it, as it sounds rubbish to me. I mean it's a musical for f*ck sake. I hate musicals, well apart from Chitty Chitty ofcourse. Most people have told me it is really good. Well maybe one day!

Posted by Markiss at 3:26 PM | Comments (0)

June 9, 2004

The blogger code

Geeks have one. So do hairy gay men and their admirers. Isn't it time bloggers have a code to describe themselves as well? Well this is my code : B4 d+ t k s- u-- f i o x e+ l c-- What's yours? Try the blogger code.

And now for some TITS this put a smile on my face :-) It's totally work safe but quite amusing the way the webmaster has designed it www.nice-tits.org..........

Posted by Markiss at 6:02 PM | Comments (0)

Flush the ducts

Whilst surfing the Net last night I came across a couple of things which I thought were worthy of going on my blog. The first being of a medical nature. Apparently flushing the ducts at least once a day keeps prostate cancer away! Well that must be as good an excuse as any :-) Have a read :::: Once a day keeps prostate cancer away? And the other was more of a green issue. I was trying to find articles on paperless offices. Our office is just full of boxes and files about 20 trees worth. So what do I find? I find a new invention for a paperless toilet! Don't know whether it will catch on but the idea is quite amusing :-)

Posted by Markiss at 2:18 PM | Comments (0)

Finally finished

Just to let you know, I have finally finished my deadline job. So should be back in form soon :) Has been a stressful couple of weeks. But worth it! Now going to bed and get myself some beauty sleep. God I need it. Oh and if I haven't already........ Congratulations to Jeremy and Vicky for giving birth to their baby daughter Poppy Ann. Two weeks early but both child and Mother (and Proud proud father) are doing well. 6lbs 14oz! Here's a pic for you.

Posted by Markiss at 1:06 AM | Comments (0)

June 8, 2004

Immunity

Well I just had to say a well done to Lemur Girl for getting immunity in Survivor! Not bad for your first attempt :-) Will be keeping a close eye on it though and fingers crossed for you......... Go Lemur Go.

Posted by Markiss at 5:30 PM | Comments (0)

Name acronym

Pinched this from Lemur Girl

M	Mystical
A	Appreciative
R	Rich
K	Kind
I	Insane
S	Stunning
S	Slippery

Name / Username:

Name Acronym Generator
From Go-Quiz.com

Posted by Markiss at 11:29 AM | Comments (0)

June 7, 2004

News Bulletin

Man sues wife over ugly past

A Chinese man has divorced and sued his wife for £55,000 after discovering she'd had plastic surgery before they met. Jian Feng, 38, was said to have been horrified when she gave birth to an ugly baby daughter. He suspected her of having an affair.

His wife then confessed to having plastic surgery costing £70,000 in South Korea before they met and showed him a picture of how she used to look.

He filed for divorce two years after marrying her following a whirlwind romance.

Posted by Markiss at 5:10 PM | Comments (0)

Hot Hot Hot!

I can't believe how damned hot it is today! and the forcast is even hotter for tomorrow. 28°C...... That's not really that hot when you are out and about but when your office is in an attic....!!!!! It is well hot. It must be over 36°C in here today. Really uncomfortable. Feel like going for a swim after work now. But apparently the sea is freezing. I just can't win here can I? Oh well back to work then.

Oh and I will leave you with a little quiz which was emailed to me this morning.

MONEY MONEY MONEY!
Below there are 12 word association clues, they can all be converted to old money. See if you can work them out. No Googling.

The total of all the answers is £32 – 17s – 8 1/2d.

1. A stone
2. A bicycle
3. A singer
4. A man’s name
5. Part of a monkey’s leg
6. A kind of pig
7. The Sun, the Moon and Pluto
8. A leather worker
9. 50% of a pair of panties
10. A royal head dress
11. To hit repeatedly
12. An unwell sea creature

Posted by Markiss at 2:51 PM | Comments (0)

See ya Steve!

Just saying bye to a good friend. Aussie Skippy Steve is leaving Jersey tomorrow to carry on his adventures around the world. You've been a good mate and hope you have a great time Steve and what an xlnt send off in the pub tonight :) Take care.............. P.S. You have got to send me a copy of the photo ;-)

Posted by Markiss at 12:09 AM | Comments (0)

June 4, 2004

Back at last

Can't believe I missed yesterday altogether. Well nevermind hopefully it wont happen again. The reason I haven't been here for 2 days is because I have been majorly busy trying to get a job finished for today. Well I have finally finished the last house now. Six in all! What a nightmare it was. At least I can try and enjoy my weekend now. So what have I got lined up for this weekend? Nothing! This is the first weekend in ages that i've had nothing planned and I am really looking forward to it. No doubt by the time I get home tonight I will have 3 or 4 things planned but that's life :) Ah ha, just remembered I have got Aussie Skippy Steve coming round tonight, to copy all of his photo's on to disk for him. So there you go, 1 thing organised already and I haven't even finished blogging yet. So what's new then? Well I have been trying out this new photoblogging software from hello recently. It's quite good apart from it doesn't let you put a title on your posts. It basically makes it really simple to place pics on your blog with resizing them to what ever you specify. So if you put a load of pics up maybe you should check out Hello for yourselves. I am working on getting the title up for the posts aswell. Right. Now to hop over to Jeremy's site to try my hand at his World of Soil Quiz and then to find some more stupid links for the day :) Have a good weekend all........

Posted by Markiss at 5:00 PM | Comments (0)

June 2, 2004

Which Office Moron Are You?

Congratulations, you're the paranoid boss. All these people around you .. they're necessary, sure, but they need to be watched. They could rise through the ranks like a crushing army of office ninjas; highly skilled human resources, trained in the art of doing things well, ready to usurp you. Be ready. Claim credit for their work. Squish them down at every possible opportunity. Screw them over. Don't give them enough money. Ensure your reign will last for a thousand years, but never, ever let them think they can compete. Which Office Moron Are You? Rum and Monkey: jamming your photocopier one tray at a time. Pinched from Xset Now I haven't got a clue whether this is accurate or not? I think I am getting paranoid! Wonder if any of my staff read this blog?

Posted by Markiss at 12:06 PM | Comments (0)

June 1, 2004

Birthday Weekend

What a weekend! I wasn't really looking forward to this weekend at first but it turned out to be a cracking one. I will try and keep it short: Friday was like any other really but without the band at the pub. At least you could actually talk to each other that night. Saturday was a different matter all together. It was Richard and Sarah's Wedding. It was held in St Ouen's Manor. One of the nicest manor's in Jersey. Let's just say it was a great day had by all. The actual ceremony was quite a short one really. I would say it lasted about 20 minutes or so. They had hired a marquee for the reception afterwards which was in the grounds of the manor too. The food and wine were flowing all day. Thanks for a great day guys and hope you are enjoying your Honeymoon. When the reception finished we headed off back home for a few more drinks. Finally finished at about 4 am. Then came Sunday, my Birthday. Well what can I say about that? Well I didn't spend a penny that day :-) I was treated to lunch by Lisa at the Windmill. The food there was xlnt! We were well looked after by our friends that work there. Thanks to Aussie Skippy Steve, Dan and Allan for that. Had a few drinks outside after the meal and then made our way down to St Mary's Country Inn. Met up with a load of mates there and left for the Tipsy Toad at about 7pm ish. (head was a bit blurry by then) The night there went really well. Met up with a load more friends there and stayed until closing, about midnight I think. It shut late that night because there were 5 bands playing. All of them good ofcourse. The last band was Take This who were spot on. We then went back to my place for a party, as we do! Started on the LARGE G&T's and things started to grind to a halt at about 4:30am. Sunday was a no go area :-) Heavy head and all! Anyway, thanks to everyone I saw that day, I had a wicked time.

Posted by Markiss at 4:21 PM | Comments (0)